2013-10-29 Language War
Held at 19:00 in Engineering Building II 1228.
In the Language War, everyone gets to speak about why their language is great, according to three different metrics! Each person may enter one language in each category, but cannot enter multiple languages in the same category. The categories are:
- No one's heard of this language, but it's awesome
- Everyone says this language is horrible, but it's not
- This language is the best for learning programming
The categories are presented in order, and within each category, language names are sorted alphabetically (so, APL goes before Java).
Presenters may use visual aids. However, in order to ensure smooth transitions between presenters, only one computer will be used (probably the one in the room already), and any resources you use must be available on the Internet. Each presenter gets 30 free seconds to locate their visual aids before their timer starts.
Each presenter will have 2 minutes of uninterrupted propaganda, followed immediately by 3 minutes where the audience gets to grill them. (These numbers are subject to change depending on how many people wish to present.) NOBODY MAY ASK QUESTIONS, MAKE SNIDE REMARKS, OR HECKLE THE PRESENTER UNTIL THE PROPAGANDA TIMER HAS EXPIRED!
At the end of each category, each presenter gets a 15-second closing statement in alphabetical order, which follows the same rules as the propaganda section. Debate on that category is then closed until dinner, and we move on to the next.
Finally, here are a few rules to keep things at a basic level of civilization:
- No physical violence of any sort.
- No personal attacks or insults against the presenter.
- No stereotypes about language communities.
- No jokes or attacks based on gender, sexual orientation, disability, physical appearance, body size, race, religion, or choice of text editor.
- No sexual language or imagery. (To avoid violating this rule, it is best to not use LOUDBOT in your talk.)
- No harassment about a person's language preferences after the war is over.
- Remember: It's just a programming language, and we're just a bunch of people hanging out on a Tuesday night. Nothing happens to your job, degree plan, professional reputation, or Reddit karma score if your language doesn't "win."
While we expect lively debate to result, there is no declared winner, because nobody wins in a language war.
(You do not have to sign up before the language war, but it's best if you do so we can plan effectively.)
Signup entries should look like this:
- Go: Alex Ray
In each category:
No one's heard of this language, but it's awesome
Everyone says this language is horrible, but it's not
- C++: ~shabren
- Haskell: Markus Eger (~yawgmoth)
- PHP: Matthew Frazier (~leafstorm) (slides)
- 6502: Barry the president (~isharacomix)
This language is the best for learning programming
Last updated by IsharaComix at